Call me crazy, but I thought that Eliza would want the boys to stay with me for many reasons, namely because:
- They were in a stable environment
- They have been through a lot
- It is their home
- She knew that I would continue escorting them to visit her
- I love them and have their best interests at heart
- I have treated her kindly and with respect
- I encouraged the kids to continue their relationship with her
So when they were taken from me, needless to say, I was very hurt and devastated. I felt betrayed in a sense. Every letter that she wrote in praise/support/encouragement of me must have been false. She was only hugging me to find the best spot to stab me in the back.
She didn’t even have the courtesy to send her sympathies.
Why would she want them with her unstable siblings? She and her sister do not have a good relationship and are quite jealous of one another. In fact, at one visit she confided in me that she actually hates her sister. Not to mention, her sister barely cares for her own two children. I don’t see how she would be able to take them to visit Eliza on a regular basis considering that she lives many states away.
And her brother–forget about it! The kids would be better off being raised by a pack of wolves than him. That would be like appointing my brother, Jazmine’s father, to raise Nicholas if something happened to me! This is too scary to even imagine. Though my brother is my kin, I know emphatically that he would not be the best candidate to raise my son. I’d much rather him be with a nonrelative than a relative with a lack of morals, human decency, and common sense.
Here’s why I think she would want her family to have them:
- She feels that they owe her as both were indirectly involved in her crime
- They are “family”
- I’m not “family” and she could care less about Nicholas
- Her sister will probably accept her collect calls
- She doesn’t have to deal with me i.e. via mail or in person, in other words, she won’t have to pretend to like me
- She is still nursing a grudge
- She never wanted them to have a relationship with me in the first place and does not want them to love me
- She doesn’t like to share
- She wants her family to keep any “benefits” (social security) in the family
- She is willing to sacrifice their wellbeing/happiness in order to punish me
- She doesn’t care about my feelings
- It’s hard to villify the person caring for your kids
- I am a reminder that her first marriage did not work
- She detested my husband
- She detests me
It seems that things have worked in her favor. Eliza would have to know that my heart is broken into a million little pieces which I’m sure the very thought fills her with joy. She does not have to fight for custody of the boys after she is released. Nor does she have to pay the court-ordered child support that has been accumulating since her incarceration. Finally she will have the kids all to herself!
I know I have to let it go because it is out of my control–something easier said than done. I’m really having a hard time with everything. However, I had the feeling last night that I should pray for them, Eliza and her siblings. You are supposed to pray for the people who persecute you.
And I will continue to pray that God will protect Ethan and Evan from any harm.