Category Archives: Hope is the thing with feathers

Hope springs eternal

The Savior Is Born

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Happy holidays beautiful people! May God bless and keep you all!

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Conqueror

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Yet in all things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.

My best friend has conquered life! On 12.12.12, she returned to our Father in heaven. I have memories that span 22 years-from elementary to college, children and husbands, shopping and dining, drinking tea, attending cultural events, worshipping together, celebrating birthdays and other milestones, and our love of all things Twilight-Team Edward (I take pleasure in the fact that it was me who got her hooked, lol)-we have traversed the roads of life together.

On the drive home from the hospital, the theme from “The Golden Girls” kept playing in my mind:

“Thank you for being a friend/Travel down the road and back again/ Your heart is true/ You’re a pal and confidante.”

She was all that and more. I’ve never had a finer friend. My heart brims over with love for her. I take comfort in knowing that absent from the body means present with the Lord. More than a conqueror, cancer didn’t beat her. She ran the race until the end. For weeping may last a night, but joy cometh in the morning!

I encouraged her to start a blog, and for a moment, she did. She didn’t write a lot, but what she did is so powerful and motivational. I am still amazed by all that she was.

I praise, bless, and thank God for our time together!

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The Missing Piece

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For we walk by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, evidence of things not seen. Hebrews 11:1

Life is like a puzzle I like to tell myself. When you are putting it together, it often looks like it will never amount to anything, especially so when it  large or provides few clues on piecing it together.

Case in point: I had a photo turned into a puzzle, and because I was being cheap, I did not order the tin that would have displayed the picture on the outside. So when putting it together, I grew frustrated because I had nothing to reference and could not find the original picture snapped on a  Hawaiian beach.

The backdrop was simply sand, sky, and sea–which made it very hard to decipher one piece from another.  I quickly decided that the company  must have gotten the puzzle all wrong, it truly did not APPEAR that it could form a legitimate image.  I finally  located the picture on my computer and worked from there. Slowly I made progress.

It wasn’t until I was virtually finished with it a few days later that I knew a picture existed. I was so excited to have the puzzle done except for one piece that I could not find. Strangely, I did not panic. I was sure it would turn up somewhere. And it did in the strangest of places.  The missing piece was on the bathroom floor!

I recalled this experience today and decided to keep a puzzle piece in my purse as a reminder.  The piece serves to remind me that everything happens as it should, and once every piece is all in place, the picture will be complete. And make sense.

Moral of my story: Have faith!

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God Sees The Truth, But Waits

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This weekend I was feeling a little down so Saturday I decided to visit the mall and treat myself.  I saw a couple of former students and chatted with them, but for the most part, I was alone with my thoughts for the next few hours.

I concluded with a bite at the food court.  As I was walking toward the exit, you all would never believe who was coming straight toward me! Ethan! Ethan who is now 15 and in the 10th grade! It was a surreal moment though I don’t know why. 

A couple of days prior my aunt’s husband told me that he saw the kids at the license branch with my former SIL.  From that I concluded that she finally received custody and the fact that she made it a point to tell him that they now lived with HER .  He also said that Evan kept asking to come over to their house.  My aunt called me later and told me she believed that was his way of getting to see me since he would not be allowed to do so outright. 

Also, Eliza had written me over the summer seeking my help in contacting their aunt regarding guardianship (because her sister no longer wanted the responsibility).  And as small as our “big” city is, I knew I would be bound to run into them sooner or later if this did happen.

I gave Ethan a hug and a kiss and inquired about Evan.  It was an awkward moment. We both  wanted to say more but not in front an audience and only talked for a few minutes because his uncle (my SIL’s husband) looked uncomfortable.  Though he has tried to stay neutral in the situation; I suppose he still has to defer to his wife.  I could see he knew that she would not be happy about our reunion.  But Ethan seemed pleased to see me.  I just wish Evan would have been with him. 

Last night I dreamed about the kids. Today I am still processing seeing him again after almost two years.  Next Monday marks the second anniversary of his father’s death. I am still being haunted by the ugliness of it all.

I feel like my enemies have won again. My SIL has the boys and has been arguing via FB with Eliza’s sister (she is the one who took them from me) regarding their social security checks!  Sadly they both only want the boys for the money they come with.

I mentioned that Eliza wrote early in the summer.  Here are the 3 of the 4 letters she sent after initially asking for my help in locating my husband’s sister:

7/9/10

Hi Morocco,

How are you? Have you heard anything from Shawn or her mom? I’m still waiting to hear something from them. I appreciate your immediate response- thank you. I have filed paperwork so I pray I receive a response from one of them soon.  Be Blessed

Always

El

10/5/10

Goodmorning M,

I pray all is well with you. I’m doing well by the grace of God. Morocco I really need your help. I need for you to mail me copies of anything you have regarding Evan’s condition. I need it as soon as you can get it to me. I’ll be home in a few months and I’ve been trying to get things ready ahead of time with family counseling. I would greatly appreciate this. I know you stayed on top of things and I will forever be grateful for the care you provided our boys. They ask me if I talk to you. Maybe if you are up to it we can get together when I get home after I get things together. Well I’ll let you go, have a blessed day. 

Sincerely

El

 10/13/10

Goodmorning Morocco,

Thank you so much I really appreciate it. I will contact you soon so that we can set something up. I talk to the boys but I don’t get to see them regularly. I know they are going to be excited to see you. I think it would be good for them. God has a way of working things out doesn’t He:)? I’ll close for now but I’ll be in touch.

Be Blessed M

Always

El

 Of course after meeting all of her requests, including contacting his sister and sending her over 250 pieces of paperwork detailing Evan’s condition, I have not heard from her.  I suppose I should have expected this from the same person who orchestrated her children’s removal from my home, sent no type of condolences after my husband’s death, and who slandered me in prison and ended up getting into a fight with Jazmine’s mom over her comments.

She also never mentioned that she had a modification hearing on October 19th in an attempt to get an early release.  I only found out because I received an email from the victim notification system.  I believe she wanted to use the paperwork to bolster the chances of having her sentence reduced.

I’ve done all I can do for her, so I foresee no reason for Eliza to contact me ever again.  She probably never intended to allow me to see her boys.  That was just the dangling carrot to manipulate me into doing what she asked.  Unfortunately that shows that she still does not get it.  I did those things for her because that’s just the kind of person that I am. 

And I do believe she is right about one thing, God does have a way of working things out. He already knew of her ill intentions and arranged for me to run into Ethan.  I do believe I’ll being seeing Evan next!

4 1/2 More

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On a hunch, I checked Jazmine’s mom release status and to my dismay, she had a new date: April 7, 2010!

Oddly enough I have been pretty calm about the matter. I have enough overwhelming my mind at the present time and I can’t worry about this. I am going to trust that God will see me through.  I have to believe that no weapon formed against me shall prosper.

Beautiful Day

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My students and I are watching the inauguration.  My kids seem to have an opinion about everything!  This is a great moment in our history so I asked a few students to share with me how they felt.  Here’s what they had to say:

This is history!  We shouldn’t have to come to school ever again on this day!  ~Howard

It’s a new beginning.  ~Donte

I am happy to be alive to witness a Black man become president. ~Fernando

On November the 4th I realized that I could be anything.  There are no more excuses that can be made by anyone in this country.  Hope is alive! ~Brian

It’s a beautiful thing.  I really want to shed a tear.  (two seconds later) I mean I’m happy to have a Black president and all, but really it’s not that deep! ~Iesha

I think he will make things better for all Americans. ~Ashley

I don’t know what to think! I can’t even express the way I feel. ~Dasha

I hope he will make college more affordable. ~Makailya

It’s amazing! ~Maurice

Barack O’bama is a rock star! ~Dashae

He has set a standard for Black people. ~Montice

Awesome!~Miles

My only wish is that my lost loved ones were here to witness the day with me.