I’ve been pondering my days as a stepmom as well as the lives of my friends who still are. Am I glad I no longer hold that title?
Yes, I think so. When I was a stepmom, my life was replete with ridiculous drama. My late husband’s ex-wife never accepted our marriage and used her kids as pawns in a sick game of revenge. With that being said, A LOT of damage was done. It was such an exhausting time for us all.
My friend Cher and I often discuss things that encompass being a stepmom. It is not for the faint@heart by any means. And she is anything but that. She has survived cancer three times for goodness sakes! Though last year I was appalled to hear her say that she never wants to date/marry another man with kids. The “but” is that she has a child. I gently scolded her, however, she stood her ground. She’s simply tired of the ignorance and malevolence that she continues to receive from her husband’s two exes. And sick of his lack of a backbone for that matter. I couldn’t understand her point of view at the time. It sounded selfish to me. Now…not so much.
I don’t want to go through what I did before.
I don’t want to be in a competition that I did not enter.
I don’t want to try to win anybody’s kids over.
I don’t want two sets of rules and confused children.
I don’t want the harassment, stalking, or the animosity.
I don’t want to be the rival, frienemy, or “cowife” of the biomom.
Nope, I don’t even want to be the darn babysitter either.
Nor do I want to be the liaison between warring parents.
I don’t want to have to file restraining orders and request phone taps.
I don’t want to sit around wondering and preparing myself for what she will “do next.”
I don’t want to turn the other cheek.
The only drama I want is on the silver screen, not with the “baby momma. “Been there, done that and look what it got me?
His death, their leaving, and the ugliness of the situation took something with me. It shook my very foundation. I don’t have it to give anymore. My heart has grown faint.